Morning Monday Advice

 

#1 – I do not like my brothers girlfriend. I think she is snotty and shouldn’t be trusted. I think he should call it quits but he keeps telling me to drop it.

It’s not your job to dictate who your brother should date. However, you are both allowed to have your own opinions about this person. It is a sucky feeling to see someone we care about with someone we don’t think is right for them but it’s not our place to say what feelings they should have. Maybe try taking some time to talk with her and get to know more about her. It’s old school advice but if your brother really likes her then it’s going to be hard to get him to see it from your perspective. Unless he is in danger then it’s time to take a step back and let them be. Who knows where they will end up. Maybe you’ll be right or maybe she won’t be so bad afterall but it’s up to your brother to find that out for himself.

#2 – I was recently blindsided by someone I thought really cared about me and I’m lost at what to do from here. I really was committed to the thought of us but I guess he wasn’t.

Oooo I wish I could jump through the computer or phone and give you the biggest hug and pig out on icecream with you right now because I am being completely honest in telling you I know how damaging it is when someone does this. I thought so too. I was so taken off guard when this happened to me *coughs into a fit of coughing because my week was literally this* but let me just say you are going to go through a range of emotions dealing with this. You might feel sadness, rage, calmness, bitterness and everything in between. It’s an awful feeling. What’s worse is when they pretend that they don’t know what they just did.  I’m going to guess that despite what he did you still care about him. I do too so I think it’s best to let them do their thing and be cordial to each other but you have to do your own thing as well. It’s going to be hard at first but I think it’s best to just gradually move on from each other.  

#3 – I have a strong urge to become a mother. I do not have a boyfriend or husband and don’t see myself doing so anytime soon but I’ve had this feeling for awhile now that I want to be a mother. I am 26 and I’ve shared my feelings with my parents and of course they are all hopped up on me getting married and then having kids. I just don’t see myself going down that route but I have a stable job and love children. It’s something I really want to do.

I have experienced this feeling too but I know right now I am not in the position to do so. Parents, family & friends might urge you to take the traditional route but it’s your body & your responsibility to do what is best for you. There are various paths you can take if you are really committed to the idea of having a child but don’t see yourself getting into a relationship. You might receive backlash from others but at the end of the day it’s your choice. There is plenty information out there on the different ways of going about it. Even if the child isn’t biologically yours, there are plenty of children that could use a loving person to take care of them.

 

#4 – School just started back up for me and I have a teacher who is already singling me out of the class and picking on me. I can’t change out because it’s a course I need to graduate but she’s already making the first few days a nightmare.

 

There’s always a bad one in the bunch. It’s just how it goes. This is a course you need so unless another teacher that also teaches it has a space open in their class you will probably be stuck. Seeing as it’s early on in the year why not take some time aside to ask your teacher a question or two. Show her that you are making an effort to do well in her class despite all her attempts to make it unbearable for you. If you have friends in the class then maybe form a deflection group that can help out if your teacher decides to single you out during the class period. If they see it’s getting uncomfortable for you maybe they can raise a hand or ask a question to get the attention off of you. If it interferes with your ability to do well in the class try and talk to another adult in the school and fill them in on what’s been going on. I wouldn’t use names unless specifically asked by a trusted teacher but maybe let someone else know you are having an issue in another class and if they can offer any suggestions. There are going to be stricter teachers than others but there’s a line between strict and abuse of power. Good luck!

 

#5 – My sister cheated on her boyfriend but hasn’t told him. I think it’s not only wrong of her to cheat but also not to tell him. If our mom knew she’d be really peeved about it.

 

Like I said above to another post about their sibling’s relationship issues.. It’s really not your place to interfere. I agree with you that she should let him know but if she is not willing or ready to then you should let her do so on her clock. If you were to tell the boyfriend it might cause trouble between you and your sister as it might if you were to tell your mom. You can sit your sister down to find out where her thinking is at right now. Get her perspective and there’s a chance that talking it out could lead to her realizing she should do the right thing.

 

#6 – Is it normal to ask a guy to a dance instead of the other way around? I have a school function coming up soon and I’d like to ask someone I know but all my friends think I should let him ask me first.

Is there an unwritten rule I don’t know about that says that girls can’t ask the guy out? I don’t think so and I think you should go for it! There is no reason in wasting time waiting for him to ask. This way you find out early enough if he was considering going or asking you in the first place. Maybe your friends are too shy to ask someone but be confident and go for it. Also, don’t sweat it if you don’t take someone. Dances are still great with your friends.

 

Glad to hear from you guys. Send me questions on any of my platforms and I’ll respond as soon as I can. Have a great day!

 

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