A Birthday That Should Have Been :

I am wishing you a very happy birthday wherever you are. I don’t know what I believe in but I want to believe in something. I want to know that you are enjoying a big slice of your favorite type of cake as balloons float around you. It’s not the same but I need to know you are celebrating still. I couldn’t bring myself to post on your wall. It just goes to an account that’s remained locked for the last year. I couldn’t bring myself to slide across to erase the notification that suggests I send birthday wishes your way. It’s the only notification still left on my phone. This day was only a few days after it happened and it’s all too much. It’s still too much. I never know what to write on birthdays. It always seems too generic..This is far more difficult for me. How do you say happy birthday to someone that’s not even here?

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