I had started writing this post yesterday in effort to have all my work done early but things have changed a smidge since yesterday. This week in general was good for me because I kept as busy as I could and limited as much of the nonsense I was previously experiencing. I am trying not to let this morning influence how I felt about this week before. I went for a follow up with my doctor to get the results on some blood work & just do a check up. It turns out my white blood cell count is low again… 3rd times the charm, right? My doctor said right out that she doesn’t believe it’s anything cancer related so not to fret but just hearing those words had me shocked. I cried on my way home because even though she doesn’t believe it’s something more serious she still has to send me to a specialist to find out the cause. It can be low for various reasons but the unknown of it has me on edge. I have faith in my doctor because she’s the only one that has run tests rather than passing me off to someone else but it’s still very nerve racking. My mom called the doctor this evening to find out more information because she’s relying on me for it and she asked straight out… you don’t think it’s Leukemia do you? Her response was no. Hearing these terms being tossed around is just such a scary experience. I rather not guess and just go in for the testing and leave it at that. This googling and guessing game will drive me nuts if I let it. I can’t let that happen.
Besides that my week has flown by. I feel like I blink my eyes and I’m doing another one of these. I was asked by a friend if it gets repetitive to do a series and for me it doesn’t. It gives me the opportunity to evaluate my week by formulating what to write and by doing so I can see if my weeks are on a good track or not. What needs changing within the 7 days? What is working to keep me happy? I find some answers as I look back on each day.
This week went well because I kept as busy as I could and limited some of the nonsense I was previously experiencing. Something so important that I noticed about my week is that I really have to find a schedule that works for me and fill it with the activities & people I enjoy because no one will know myself better than I do. I know I am going to face hard times within the week because I am dealing with certain things that unless you go through them you won’t know just how difficult it can be. I would love to make everyone else happy but that is unrealistic to expect of anyone. I have to make sure my health and happiness are taken care of so I can put my best foot forward and be there for others. This week I’ve done a great deal of hiking which has been a really nice addition to each day. It hurts but I am using that pain as motivation to find answers and not settle by putting my health on the backburner. It’s not fair to let myself fall victim to an unknown issue so I’ve got to push forward as much as possible.
I hope you guys are doing well and thank you for sticking with me!